When I was little I thought my dad was on the radio. It was actually Kenny Hinson, but I told everyone that it was my Daddy. I am not sure he ever told me any different at the time! I don't think he sounds like Kenny anymore, but he has always been my favorite singer/pianist/songwriter. That is one thing that I have always had a connection with my dad about--music. This has also been a source of disagreement too! But I have always admired him and his skill, and how much hard work and time he put into it. Time sometimes spent away from his family; time spent working on a piano riff instead of watching tv or being lazy; time spent all hours of the night in the garage banging on his keyboard and singing praises to God, losing sleep to do what he does best. Now I am happy to say that for the last decade of my life, I have been able to spend much of my time singing with my dad and being a part of his music ministry. I have had more time with him than my sister for this reason, and more time than probably most children get to spend with their dads because we share a love for music and the same desire to lead people in worship. I thank God for this. I have a lot of good memories from these years and I plan to make many more. I especially like that one time when he played the right note. (Haha! There are a few people who know what this means!).
I grew up staying up late watching the Braves and eating ice cream. I remember watching cartoons and taking naps on Saturdays. Dad and I would lay on the couch and I would usually end up slobbering all over him. I remember waking up sweaty with my hair all stuck to my face and his arm. Haha! I still love naps! He put up a basketball goal for me outside and we would shoot around. He would make some crazy shots from behind the house, across the road, and throw up any kind of crap and it would go in. I also remember a trip to the ER because he was chasing after the ball and ran into a horseshoe stob and tore his skin off down to the bone. Wow. I remember his little green truck and riding to work with him. I remember him dancing with our dog in the backyard. I heard a lot of stories like, "when I was a kid all I had to play with was sticks and rocks" and "I had to sleep with 15 blankets because snow would come in through the cracks in the walls" and plenty of other sad situations. I finally told him, "Daddy, please don't tell me any more sad stories." He still does. I think this somehow brings him pleasure. =) I also remember the belt, and LONG talks until I became delirious and started laughing and got in more trouble!
He has set a good example for me. Not because he is perfect though. He has made plenty of mistakes since I remember and probably lots more that I do not care to know about, but it is because he never let his mistakes become 'who he is.' He has never settled for anything less than a full recovery from his mistakes. I just realized that today. You can let situations and failures turn you into someone you don't want to be. It can make you cold-hearted and miserable, low-down and vindictive--but my dad is none of those things. He is a man of integrity. He raised his children to respect their mother, to follow through and keep your word to people, to try your best and not do something halfway, to believe in yourself, and to love the Lord. He taught me to be ME; that there was no one like me; that God sees something special in me and that there is nothing I can't do. Just TRUST GOD. He is mine and my sister's biggest fans. Whether she is baking cakes or I am singing a solo; or she is upset and worried about her kids and I am stressed about my job and if I made the right career choice--he is our number one fan and steady support. He is actually a great cheerleader! And he will give you a swift kick in the tail if you need one too! We went through some rough times together. I walked away from God once, forsaking my family. I was deceived. I didn't know what I was really doing; didn't know the consequences of my actions. He would get in my face and give me the word of God like I needed to hear it. Of course, I didn't listen. But he prayed for me and cried out to God to save me and spare my life and bring me to my senses. It took a while but I finally did. I am certain that Daddy's tears and prayers changed my life. I couldn't stand it at the time, but I am glad he never gave up on me. He knew I was worth more than that. I deeply regret all the heartache I caused him and the shame I brought to my family. But when a Father loves his child, there is nothing you can do to destroy that love. No matter what you've done, he always wants you to come back home. Kinda sound familiar?
His life has taught me that God really does work in mysterious ways!! I have asked God many times why he has not let Daddy become famous, why he never made it to Nashville, or why he isn't a worship leader for some 10,000 member congregation, or why he doesn't get to travel the world with his music. I have seen my dad work and toil for my entire life and I have always wondered what he could have done to make things different. I guess this is for selfish reasons. I would have loved to grow up with lots of money and fame. What kid doesn't think so? But now I am so glad that I had what I got. A pretty normal family growing up with a dad who was home and able to come to my ball games instead of a dad who worked too much or traveled so much that it was like he was never there. Daddy doesn't want any of that stuff either. He says his greatest accomplishment in his life is his family. He loves his kids and grandkids and doesn't want anything else really. He only wants to fulfill what God has planned for him. So now, at a distinguished age :) he is doing just that by signing a record deal with Tate Music Group and releasing his first album with them soon. I know God has plans for some of these songs. Through watching this unfold I have learned that no matter how you try to rush God, you can't do any better with timing than He can!
Oh my, I have rambled and said too much. Said things I didn't intend and left out what I thought I would write. Maybe I should write a novelette--there is far too much I could write about my dad, the memories, and what a good man he is. There will never be another man like Mike Phillips.
Daddy, I had to write this because I could never say it to your face. I would cry the ugly cry and you would never understand what I said. It would be like the Verizon commercial with the mom and daughter where you need subtitles to understand what they are saying. I love you so much it almost hurts. I feel sorry for girls who grow up without a daddy or the ones who have dads who don't care about them or abuse them. I never did anything to deserve such a special dad. The only thing I can accuse you of doing to me is making corny jokes every now and then! LOL. Thank you for being my teacher, mentor, cheerleader, comic relief, fearless protector, watchdog, and friend. I LOVE YOU, DADDY.
